Friday, September 21, 2012

5 Horrible Horror Movies You Must See

I've been watching horror movies for as long as I can remember. Whenever my father was around (which wasn't much), his idea of quality family time would be to sit in the living room and watch a boatload of movies from Blockbuster. The rating of the film didn't matter, so I always ended choosing R-rated horror flicks with the worst plot lines and makeup effects possible.

I remember being about 5 years old and watching The Exorcist with my older brother, terrified out of my mind that I was going to wake up next to a possessed Linda Blair. I also remember watching the Texas Chainsaw Massacre when I wasn't much older, and waking up to a nightmare of Leatherface coming out of my closet.

Despite many scared nights of peeing my pants and crying myself to sleep, I still wanted to watch scary movies. And for some reason, the more B-rated and gory, the better!

That being said, if you're a fan of cheesy horror movies like myself, then here's a list for you to check out on Netflix whenever you get the aching for a good laugh. Many of these are from the '80s because let's face it, the '80s ruled.

1.  The Stuff - 1985

I rented this movie because the cover looked cool. It's basically the face of a guy screaming in agonizing pain because white "stuff" is oozing out of his eyes and mouth. The "stuff" is marketed like ice cream, but turns out to be an alien organism that turns people into zombies. So bad that you can't stop watching until the end.

2. Night of the Creeps - 1986

"First they're under you. Around you. On you. And then, inside you." That's directly from the trailer for this alien/zombie/horror movie that features creatures that look like coked-out slugs. It's about as entertaining as a low budget '80s movie can get, but boy is it entertaining.

3. Dead Alive - 1992

Originally titled Braindead in New Zealand, this was one of the first films directed by Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson. All I need to say are three things: zombie baby, lawnmower death and a preacher that "kicks ass for the Lord." Watch it NOW.

4. Army of Darkness - 1992

This is the third film in the Evil Dead trilogy, which are all terribly awesome and feature badass Bruce Campbell as Ash Williams. Sam Raimi, who did these long before the Spider-Man films, created something magical by combining zombies, demons and medieval soldiers. Watch and find out the power of the boomstick.

5. Feast - 2005

This was actually a product of the t.v. series Project Greenlight, created by the production company of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. It features a cast of hooligans (like Henry Rollins and 30 Rock's Judah Friedlander) who are trapped in a bar because they're being terrorized by monsters. The cheesy gore factor in this more recent film rivals any '80s film I've ever seen.


  1. Terrible list. These films aren't horrible. They're enjoyable and fun to watch and some are even well made. Well, The Stuff is pretty bad...

  2. Bell Nuntita has a cameo role as a flight attendant in a new Thai horror movie titled "407 Dark Flight" from Five Star Production Company that also brought you the old horror movies